I resent being mistreated by others. I resent being mistreated by my family. I resent being taught to seek authority only from external, and at times, imaginary sources. I resent being lied to. I resent the people around me. I resent the world and it's unbelievable stupidity. I resent you. I resent this blog. I resent being here. I resent my life, and I resent yours moreso. I resent the existence of anything beautiful. I resent myself.
I resent the shit - SHIT - job my parents did raising me. I resent the molestation of my four year old body by my stepfather. I resent the denial of that molestation by my biological mother, his wife, to this very day. I resent being taught such terrible truths about life - that truth is lies, lies are truth, and The Truth doesn't really matter to anyone. I resent that my life means so little to the bastards responsible for making it be. I resent waking up and breathing every day. I resent the pain and suffering I have endured and endure today as a result of so many bad decisions by others. I resent what my life has been like.
I resent learning the hard way. I resent being out of place and out of time. I resent being different, unacceptable, and unincluded in every group. I resent being everyone else's /other./ I resent being unaware of the ability or how to fit in. I resent being myself. I resent what you think of me. I resent it being true. I resent its inaccuracy. I resent your thinking it. I resent being thought of in that way. I resent our mind games.
I resent writing this blog post, and I resent you for reading it. I resent its being read, and I resent its posting.
I resent wanting to cry right now.
I resent this moment unfolding into our next moment together. I resent it unfolding. I resent it passing away. I resent everything.
I want to sleep.
